Thursday, 25 August 2011

“Hold this one....”


41 years ago today these infamous words were spoken to my mother “Here hold this one while I get the other one”. “Get the other what” my mum was heard to shriek.  “Baby?” came the reply.  Yes, all those years ago I entered the world the elder of twin girls to the utter surprise to my parents.  It really was an utter shock to them, as not only was the pregnancy not planned, as they already 3 children, but twins!

Back in those days there were no scans available to check on what was going on with your pregnancy.  My mother had absolutely no idea that she was carrying twins.  There was the odd disagreement between the doctor and midwife about the number of heartbeats, the third faint one was just an echo apparently!  But the doctor was adamant that there was one very large baby and that was all.

Times where so much simpler then, my mum like many in her generation, ate what she wanted, drank (she wasn’t a big drinker) and smoked (like a chimney) unaware of the affect to her unborn babies.   They just got on with life, no sitting back and feeling sorry for themselves over morning sickness, or what to wear as it wasn’t a fashion show.  There were no celebrity mummies showing off their fantastic post baby bodies, to make you want to reach for the cookie jar.  
You weren’t unique you were just pregnant like millions of women before and after.   If they had a problem or unsure of anything they just asked their own mothers, no going online to self diagnose yourself.  

I can hardly compare her experiences with mine as it is a far cry from the stresses of having a baby today.  Apart from the medical care you get now, which I must add helped me have my two boys, so I will be eternally grateful to the NHS.  There is the endless bombardment of the media telling you want you should and shouldn’t be doing.  How the decisions you are making now mean you are already a bad mother before you have even given birth. All the must have baby items that you need so you have a happy baby.  These items that you don’t really need, but think you do otherwise you aren’t a good mum.  That you eventually dig out of the bottom of the cupboard months later never used and wonder why on earth you brought it in the first place.

Makes me think, perhaps she had the better pregnancy experience than me.  Perhaps ignorance in some ways is bliss.... 


P.S.   Finally I thought I would share my birthday card from Mr P, arh he knows me so well...







16 comments:

Emma said...

Wow that must have been some surprise!! Happy Birthday! Have a lovely day! Emma :)

The Time Sculptor said...

I can't imagine coping with twins... I suppose you just have to get on with it (like your Mum did) and get used to it gradually.
I've just done a post about all the embarrassing things my little girl said, and I guess you might have double trouble with yours ;-)
Jane Gray

Crystal Jigsaw said...

Happy Birthday!!!

This is so true. I do believe things were much more simple back in the olden days though the technology and knowledge wasn't quite the same.

CJ xx

Frankie P said...

Thanks everyone for your comments... x

Sarah said...

Your mums an amazing woman - I bet she took those words in her stride! I hope today was awesome for you, and I love the card hahaha! Xxx

Rachel Faith said...

Happy birthday! What a wonderful story. Good to remember, isn't it, that pregnancy and mothering falls victim to fashion just like anything else. I do hope that card gets an honoured place in your home too.

Frankie P said...

Cheers Sarah, she would like to hear that... Brilliant card i know, just
had to share xx

Frankie P said...

Hey Rachel, it is so true and who knows where we will be in another 40 years with mothering... Oh yes the card will do, no worries about that.. x

Musings from a mum said...

Happy Birthday! And well done to your mum. I think in some ways not knowing what was coming might have been a blessing - but I'm sure you and your sister were angels ;-) !

Enjoy the rest of your day.

Frankie P said...

Hi Musing, angels... that is one word to describe us i suppose.. Thanks for stopping by...

Stigmum said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! I hope you are still celebrating one day on and have a most fantastic funfilled year following all advice on your birthday card! Too many expectations on mothers these days. Your mum had her hands full for sure but did a fine job didn't she?! Many many happy returns! x

Katie aka @mummydaddyme said...

It is mad how pregnancy has changed isn't it? I hope you had a lovely birthday. x

Jacq said...

Oh Happy Birthday for Thursday. I love your card. I have a friend who sends me fantastic cards like that now and again. Cheers me up no end.

Mari's World said...

I'm late!!! but Happy belated birthday hope it was brilliant - judging by the card it was :)
My OH came into the world the 'second' twin too and his mum only found out a couple of days before going into labour as she had to go into hospital for high BP, in fact she swears the shock of discovering she had twins sent her into early labour, two boys born 5 weeks early. I agree with everything you have said

1978rebecca said...

Wow! Imagine having twins and not knowing before they were born. Thank goodness for ultrasounds. It was a shock when we found out at 8 weeks but at least we had time to get used to the idea.

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