Thursday, 25 August 2011
41 years ago today these infamous words were spoken to my mother “Here hold this one while I get the other one”. “Get the other what” my mum was heard to shriek. “Baby?” came the reply. Yes, all those years ago I entered the world the elder of twin girls to the utter surprise to my parents. It really was an utter shock to them, as not only was the pregnancy not planned, as they already 3 children, but twins!
Back in those days there were no scans available to check on what was going on with your pregnancy. My mother had absolutely no idea that she was carrying twins. There was the odd disagreement between the doctor and midwife about the number of heartbeats, the third faint one was just an echo apparently! But the doctor was adamant that there was one very large baby and that was all.
Times where so much simpler then, my mum like many in her generation, ate what she wanted, drank (she wasn’t a big drinker) and smoked (like a chimney) unaware of the affect to her unborn babies. They just got on with life, no sitting back and feeling sorry for themselves over morning sickness, or what to wear as it wasn’t a fashion show. There were no celebrity mummies showing off their fantastic post baby bodies, to make you want to reach for the cookie jar. You weren’t unique you were just pregnant like millions of women before and after. If they had a problem or unsure of anything they just asked their own mothers, no going online to self diagnose yourself.
I can hardly compare her experiences with mine as it is a far cry from the stresses of having a baby today. Apart from the medical care you get now, which I must add helped me have my two boys, so I will be eternally grateful to the NHS. There is the endless bombardment of the media telling you want you should and shouldn’t be doing. How the decisions you are making now mean you are already a bad mother before you have even given birth. All the must have baby items that you need so you have a happy baby. These items that you don’t really need, but think you do otherwise you aren’t a good mum. That you eventually dig out of the bottom of the cupboard months later never used and wonder why on earth you brought it in the first place.
Makes me think, perhaps she had the better pregnancy experience than me. Perhaps ignorance in some ways is bliss....
P.S. Finally I thought I would share my birthday card from Mr P, arh he knows me so well...