Okay, okay, I admit it...

It would be fair to say that the last 8 months or so I have been in denial to what or who I am.  But that all changed this week with the click of a mouse button when I was asked for my occupation at the bank.  I am not currently working was my reply, so with a CLICK I became a ‘housewife’.  Right before my eyes, CLICK, just like that.  Apparently there was no need to discuss this with me.  It seems that any woman who has children and isn’t in employment must be a housewife!  So the decision was made while I sat there quietly outraged (that’s my inner feminist) and Mr. P just smirked knowingly!

You see I haven’t really come to terms yet to say that I am a SAHM.  To all new people I meet and on any forms that I need to complete I am still an IT Manager.  Someone who works and has a life outside of children and the home, but who is currently having an unexpected extended break.  Why do I do this still?  No idea, but I have read some pretty good blogs recently about lost of identity and what life was like before children.  So I guess that pretty much sums up how I feel.  That with that little click the last 20 years of my life and experiences has somehow been wiped out.  That my role in life has now changed to that of a housewife because that is what society or the bank’s computer system thinks I am.  So what will this new role bring I ask?  Will I still be interesting to other people?  Will “Yes hello, I am currently at home with the kids” be met with blank stares or even worst that pitying smirk that some people like to give.  Will I lose whatever fashion sense I had while working and resort to anything that is comfy?  Will my ability to drink copious amounts of alcohol disappear since I no longer have work drinks or even worst am I am expected not to drink (copious amounts) since I am now a housewife? 

Now of course there is nothing wrong with being called a housewife, after all that is what many of my friends are.  But it does scream (well to me) images of a perfectly coiffure woman in an apron, holding babies and smiling sweetly at hubby.  Not the reality of a over tired woman trying to juggle housework, food shopping, school run, afterschool activities, cooking, bathing and story reading.

But the alternatives are not any better, Home Executive, Home maker, Soccer Mom, Lady of the house, Home Economist!  I mean really, am I the only one that thinks this? 

I think I will settle for what my mum used to say in her younger days when we were all still at home… “wife, mother, chief cook and bottle washer”. 

Just try fitting that into your little box Mr. Bank Manager!

Bessie....

It seems our boys have a new playmate, a new friend for life.  She has helped them settle in more than we could have done.  She is full of energy, patience and very gentle with them, in fact I think placid would be a good word to use for her.  She is Bessie, my sister’s 2 year old dog.  Now don’t go thinking of a wee little 2 year old puppy dog.  Oh no, this little 2 year old is a big, bouncing puppy dog.  There have been many incidents of “Bessie has pushed me over” or “Naughty Bessie” as Son no 2 has been hit in the face by her very excitable tail.  But all in all they just pick themselves up and carry on laughing and playing with her.

Since the day we arrived they have not left her side, every waking moment is spent running round with her, playing ball or making up imagery games where she is inevitably sat on.  Okay, so that may be where the placid may be bordering on dumb as she keeps going back for more!  But while it may be just games for my boys, she in her doggie way is teaching them some valuable lessons in life, friendship, respect, loyalty and of course love.  That true steadfast kinda of love, the kind that doesn’t matter what or who you are or do, they will always be there for you. 

So while I go and do “Poo Patrol” to avoid any nasty accidents with bare feet I leave you with this poem by Edgar Guest.  I think it sums it all up....

A Boy and His Dog

A boy and his dog make a glorious pair:

No better friendship is found anywhere,

For they talk and they walk and they run and they play,

And they have their deep secrets for many a day;

And that boy has a comrade who thinks and who feels,

Who walks down the road with a dog at his heels.

He may go where he will and his dog will be there,

May revel in mud and his dog will not care;

Faithful he'll stay for the slightest command

And bark with delight at the touch of his hand;

Oh, he owns a treasure which nobody steals,

Who walks down the road with a dog at his heels.

No other can lure him away from his side;

He's proof against riches and station and pride;

Fine dress does not charm him, and flattery's breath

Is lost on the dog, for he's faithful to death;

He sees the great soul which the body conceals--

Oh, it's great to be young with a dog at your heels!

So here we are......

So hello there, yes it’s been a while hasn’t it? 

We are now 3 weeks back to being in New Zealand, slowly getting settled and so far so good...

The flight over wasn’t too bad with the boys, all 29 hours of it!  Never underestimate the power of Chupa Chups lollipops and Cars 2.  The first kept them entertained during the all so tedious checking in and security process. Of course much more were demanded for takeoff and landing.  The latter kept them entertained on the flight, in between eating (more sweets and chocolate, they didn't want any of the airline food!) and sleeping they were glued to their little screens.  It didn’t matter that Son No 2 couldn’t get to grips with the head phones so just spent the time watching it with no sound.  He was happy so we were happy.

Once we got here the first two weeks were spent travelling around the country visiting family, so more flights and Chupa Chups for the boys.  Perhaps, now thinking about it, the overload of sweets may of been the cause of Son No 1 couple of bouts of air sickness?  We also had a bit of an eating frenzy, eating everything that we missed while in the UK.   The boys it seems have already slipped into the laidback lifestyle here, playing in the surf at various beaches, eating ice creams and running around in bare feet seems quite normal for them now.

Needless to say the visiting and feeding frenzy is now over and we are now getting some sense of normality back into our lives.  Mr P has started work; Son No 1 is in school which is a bloody godsend even if it is only for 4 weeks until its summer holidays over here.  He was getting quite unbearable and annoying, does that make me a bad mother saying that? No, just honest I think, as there is nothing quite like a bored 5 year old to tip you over the edge!  Even he wanted to start school.  I have even managed to find a childminder to look after Son No 2 for a couple of days a week so I can get some much needed me time.  Some time to think about what I am going to do now.  You know those questions that always seem to be lurking in the back of your mind.  Do I work, if so part time or full time work?  Do I do some courses instead?  Can I really be bothered to join a gym?  Should i sneak off and have another cream donut?   Or is it just me that thinks these things?

In the meantime I have a much neglected blog that needs some loving and need to find us a home before we drive my sister and her partner around the bend.....

"Walking thru an empty house, tears in my eyes...... This is where the story ends"

My dearest London,

The time has finally come to say goodbye. Our home is no more, all it's content packed up and ready to be shipped. Every room empty now, filled only with echoey silence, no sign that it used to be our home.

What can I say, its been a blast my old friend. From being a gateway to Europe for all our travels. To the dodgy pubs and clubs I have crawl out of at some ungodly hour. From fine dining to the old faithful local greasy spoon. To the great shopping on the High street, from cheap as chips, designer stuff, M&S food and underwear. I will miss all of this. To providing me with the excellent care to allow me to have our two gorgeous boys. To, of course, all the great people I have met and the good friends I have made, I will miss you all so much.

So thank you London for making the last decade, my thirties a truly memorable time.

Of course it hasn't always been good, there will be things that I will definitely not miss. From the snow, god how I hate the snow. How the whole city, no country, grounds to a halt is
beyond me! To the endless football coverage, dodgy summers, overcrowded tubes, tourist packed streets. No I won't miss them at all.

So yes I will miss you dear old London but as the song goes "this is where our story ends".

So now on to the next chapter and to whatever it may bring.


Yours truly



Frankie P xx

My week that was...

So in terms of surviving I am not talking a major natural disaster or catastrophe event here, but nonetheless for us it was a pretty big deal. I went to Bangkok for a week for my brother’s wedding while Mr P looked after our two boys on his own. I am happy to say it all went well, so well in fact that I might just have to do it again!

Bangkok was a blast, I really love this city. I thought this the last time I was there so was a bit hesitant about whether I would feel the same but I did. If you look pass the seedy aspect of it; it is a city just like any other major city in the world, full of the hustle and bustle of everyday living. The people are so friendly the food is great and the shopping is amazing. From the real designer goods in the malls to the very good knock offs in the various markets.

Even more surprising is that we, my siblings and I, managed not to have any major disagreements. Which if you knew my family is something of a rarity.  Yes, we are generally a close family but we are all quite opinionated and think we are always right! Which usually is a recipe for disaster if we spend too long in each other's company.  It was getting a bit fraught at the end after many sleepless nights and the odd hangover thrown into the mix but we got there in the end.

The Wedding day in itself was an experience money couldn’t buy. It started at 6am with a get together before the traditional Buddhist wedding. My new sister in-law’s family took us “farang” into their home, fed us, celebrated with us, even danced with us. In the evening we reciprocated with the “western” reception, where again we celebrated, ate and danced. I think it is fair to say that there was a lot of eating and drinking done by both sides of the wedding party on the day.

What about Mr P, left all alone in dreary London, you may ask?? Well he managed to survive his week of bonding with his sons. Of course the house was a total mess when I got back but they all seemed to enjoy not having me about to nag, shout and moan at them all.

However since I have been back he has come up with rather head shaking (me) and eye rolling (me again) comments...

“My hands are really dry now they always seem to be in water of some kind"


"What a nightmare it was trying to sort out their meals every day”. Bearing in mind I left him enough meals and a list of what to feed them every day!”

“Mealtimes are just so stressful”


“You know there were some days there that I felt I was always in the car, either dropping off somewhere or picking up or even going to the bloody supermarket...”

Hmmm, “No shit, Sherlock.. Welcome to my world!”

Silent Sunday

“Oh my dear, how I have been neglecting thee.....”

Crikey, I can’t believe that it has been over two weeks since I last posted something or even been on Twitter. There was a brief period of “oh no what I am missing out on” but that soon went and then I realised that I had so much stuff to sort out. So it has been a bit of a hectic and exhausting two week to say the least.

Hectic, as I have been trying to sort everything out for our move back to NZ before I leave for Bangkok tonight for my brother’s wedding! Oh yes nothing like having a holiday 4 weeks before you permanently leave a country but when I booked it back in August we had no idea that we would be moving back to NZ in November.

Exhausting, as we thought it would be a good time to move our little terror, that’s Son No 2 into his own bed. So for the last two weeks we have been getting a morning visitor at 5.30am who doesn’t believe in going back to bed. In fact he doesn’t believe in going to bed at anytime of the day now.. Oh, he used to be such a good little sleeper..

But it’s all coming together nicely and we will be sorted for our big move. It still feels very daunting and the excitement is yet to kick in but I am sure it will happen soon.

So thank you all for your comments, normal blogging service will resume shortly and apologises if I don’t get round to commenting over the next few weeks..

So now I just need to pack a bag and remember my passport...